Nuthin' but a Gaul Thang

Un, deux, trois et a la quatre

Chillin in the spot with my homey Jacques Chirac

Ready to make an entrance, even though we reek

Cause you know we shower once a week

Gimme the hand mirror first so I can adjust my beret

Wagglin my Froggy-ass hips to make sure I look okay

It ain't nothin but a Gaul thing, baby

One third-rate power goin crazy

I don't work but my government pays me

Inscrutable, so please don't try to read this

But uh, back to the matter at hand

We're frontin geopolitics you only understand

From a Gallic perspective

Once we were glorious but that glory's retrospective

You never know, we could be rising again, surprising again

Philosophize and moralizing again

Now you know we down wit the intellectual

Even if our government and economy are ineffectual

And that's realer than Chucky Chuck de Gaulle

And all you American peeps gon' take a fall

But if you're smart enough to make your treaties quite correct

We might give tourists a bit less disrespect

C'est comme ca et comme ci et comme ca and uh

C'est comme ci et comme ca et comme ci and uh

C'est comme ca et comme ci et comme ca and uh

Chirac, approches le mic comme un voleur

Well I'm stinkin and I'm stinkin and I'm stinkin

Only wash my private parts, don't know what the hell I'm thinkin

But I'm on the microphone and I'm bout set

So grab a black turtleneck and a fresh baguette

Sit in an outdoor cafe and simply talk

Try to ignore the dog crap all over the sidewalk

Wastin my day drinkin café and I'm at peace

Cause you know and I know my welfare will never cease

To be quite realistic, we're socialistic, you say Froggy slob, get a job

Admit this is true: c'est rien pour vous

Cause my unemployment rate is about 42

C'est comme ca et comme ci et comme ca and uh

C'est comme ci et comme ca et comme ci and uh

C'est comme ca, et qui donne un merde sur le vogue?

Soyez froid pour l'episode prochain

(short break)

Try and play yourself up, but the French will do as we please

Getting funky on the mic like an old wheel of Roquefort cheese

It's the capital E-t-h-n-o and to the c

E-n-t-r-i-s-m that we believe, you see?

Got Napoleon's blood so you know we ain't scared

Yankees, I will play you out like my name was Moliere

Oui, et on ne s'arrete jamais

And how could I forget Voltaire, Flaubert and Rabelais?

So J [pronounced as in French, like "g"] (JC) What up frog?

Gotta give ‘em what they want (JC) Qu'est-ce c'est?

Gotta break ‘em off sumthin (JC) C'est l'enfer!

Even if unfairly (both) Cité de Paris

Is where it takes place, so amass your uprising

It's happened before so it really ain't surprising

Fifth Republic, Sixth Republic, what's comin next?

Third Estate teeming, always bringing wreck

Try to make us work, and we'll go out on strike

Anger us and we impale our leaders' heads on pikes

Never make us work, cause if we work, then we're sweatin

And if Air France was running then you know I'm straight jettin

And I'm'a continue my demonstration, constant agitation

And if my leaders talk merde, I'll start a new nation

Yeah, and it don't stop

My guillotine goes chop chop chop when it drop drop drop

Makin leaders flee, with much glee, never embarras

La F-r-a-n-c-e, and the city they call Paris

Taking governments apart

Cause in France we turned bitchin-n-moanin into art

Comme ca, ci, et ca and uh

C'est comme ca et comme ci et comme ca and uh

C'est comme ca, et qui donne un merde sur le vogue?

Soyez froid depuis l'episode prochain

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